Thursday, December 10, 2009
Friday, December 4, 2009
Black English
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Stories
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
I Thought Punctuation Ended a Thought
Monday, November 30, 2009
I just finished playing waterball and it was pathetic. Our team won with such ease that it wasn't even fun, so I was left with an empty feeling in my soul.
In other news, Barack Obama made himself a bowl of cereal this morning and the media has not ceased in there praising. But seriously, GQ named him leader of the year, and he still hasn't done a damn thing. It really bakes my beans too.
So to soothe my raging soul... I present to you. Surprised Kitty:
You now have diabetes
Brooksie
Sunday, November 29, 2009
I'm back
Guess what! I'm engaged. As in engaged to be married. As in about to enter in to a lifelong love covenant with another human being. I'm freaking pumped. Like seriously ecstatic. Should i post the story up on the blog?
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Parent's House
Bonus Material: Fangst- what every emo girl that goes to watch Twilight suffers from
Brooksie
Monday, November 23, 2009
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Man Up Your Thanksgiving
Mental and Physical Preparation
Often, people will limit their eating during the day in anticipation of the evening feast. This is a flawed way of looking at Thanksgiving. A man needs to be prepared for work when he sits down at the table. Neglecting his nutrition all day will not make him able to consume more; if anything it will shrink his stomach so that it will take less food to fill him. A man’s best course of action is to eat plenty of the one meat that hardly ever appears in a traditional American Thanksgiving: bacon.
Football
Our most American sport (sorry, Baseball) and our most American holiday (sorry, Flag Day) have been intertwined for over a century. We would be remiss not to make mention of how crucial football is to any reasonable Thanksgiving celebration. That said, giving tips on how to enjoy a football game could be an article unto itself. So instead, here is one tip to live by in general: at high school football games, no one likes the 25+ year old alumnus trying to pick up cheerleaders.
Parades
Parades typically have too much in common with Broadway musicals to be considered manly. Just skip it. Either that or invent some sort of drinking game like, “Take a shot every time you see a fat guy in a sequined suit that might have fit him fifteen Thanksgivings ago.”
Dinner
The best way to man up an already manly ritual is to turn it into a competition. All of your relatives strong enough to participate should. This leaves the grandparents (should there be any present) in charge of judging. Begin with a weigh-in before dinner. Take VERY PRECISE MEASUREMENTS, GRANDMA, as even a few ounces could determine a victory. Enjoy the full meal including dessert, and weigh-in again before anyone gets a chance to digest. The winner will be given the ______ Family Fatty Crown and a gift certificate to the restaurant of his/her choice, paid for by the losers. Don’t forget to wash it all down with some...
Wild Turkey!
So give thanks, eat up, take a tryptophan-induced nap, and be a man.
***N.O.M.***
Brooksie Baby
Friday, November 20, 2009
Chaos
Life is too much pushed through a space that is too small.
Father grant me peace
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Relax
I did learn something about myself today and that is when I'm nervous and there is food present.... I will eat it. I was kind of nervous about this presentation, not because I don't like speaking in public, but because I was going to have to bullshit the entire thing. Don't worry my bullshitting went very well, and to celebrate me and Kristina went out for a stiff drink. Which leads us to now..... ok enough with this
I want you all to sit back and get very comfortable. You comfortable? Now clear your mind of all that you have to do and listen to this song and watch this video in full screen and HD setting
Tell me what you think and feel...
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
The Story Continues....
The flying fishy fiends flopped into the Emerald City with all the power of a tsunami. Fins, gills, tails, and munchkin body parts began to fly. The attack had begun. The munchkins cowered in fear at the scaled army, while the carp showed no mercy. Their razor sharp dorsal fins slashed huge gashes in the dwarfed appendages of munchkins. Their powerful scaled tails thrashed about with bone crushing power, much to the dismay of any munchkin that found themselves within their range.
A grim smile found its way to the metallic mouth of the Tin Man. It was a truly unnatural expression. Tin Man hovered above the carnage, while scanning the battlefield, looking for his mark. He saw the Munchkin Marines and the Royally Small Guard organizing a counter offensive in the distance. "Excellent" he though to himself. He knew that, with the army out fighting his fishy fellows, the Wizard would be left with minimal security.
He wanted to save his strength for his fight with the Wiz, so he switched to his stealth mode, which all good tin men have, and headed towards the Wizard's tower. He arrived at the tower and was able to slip past most of the remaining guards. However, the final two guards saw through the Tin Man's disguise and launched a brutal attack at the Tin Man as he tried to move past them and into the Wizard's chamber.
The battle was quick but ferocious. The guards were able to do extensive damage to the Tin Man's disguise, but were no match for the Tin Man's destructive power.
Having dispatched the final line of defense for the Wiz, he kicked open the doors to the Wizard's Chamber and looked in upon his adversary with true hatred.
OK, I had quite a few requests for the continuation of that story. There shall be more....bwahahahahahahahahaha.
So, I'm proud of Brandon. He has been steadfast in his commitment to this journey and is writing some really good blog posts. You should definitely give his blog a read. http://bkingya.blogspot.com/
I hate people that think that they are far more important than they really are. They have this annoying habit of thinking that they can say things and get away with it. The sad part is.... that they can. Even though my insides burn with unspeakable rage, there is nothing I can do. This is because usually these people only behave this way in public forums, where I cannot succumb to my Viking instincts and smash their measly mortal bones into the ground. One day...I will catch them in a dark alley and then I will exact my revenge.
Day 12 in the Books
We will see ya bud,
Brooksie F. Baby
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
There has been an outcry for a continuation of yesterdays story... so I shall appease the masses and post one within the next few days. Any suggestions on general directions that the story should go?
I want this blog to become popular, but I know that I need to invest more time in it for that to happen. Unfortunately I do not have that time to give. I will continue to strive to allocate more time for quality posts. But we all know that popularity is fleeting as is show in this poster:
Monday, November 16, 2009
I don't think before I act at times. Like today, I re-activated my account on Facebook. I don't know why though. I hated Facebook and got so disgusted with it that I quit, but there I was rejoining the rest of the world on the largest social networking site in existence. I am not as cool and original as I like to think. I am proud that I managed to make it almost two years without Facebook, though.
Today is the Birthday of LSD ( at least for the next 45 minutes) so I present you with this video in honor of the day:
YELL from Larry Carlson on Vimeo.
That video creeps my out and I have never taken LSD. I can only imagine that it is worse for everyone who has. Sorry for the slow blog today. I got some good stuff planned for you tomorrow. I was a little discouraged today, because today was the first day since I started this blog that no one commented on a post. Oh well, I'm sure that I will bounce back.
Holler at a Player When You See Him On the Street
Brooksie
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Cowboys, Children, and Carp
Watching the Cowboys is just too painful right now, so I will blog instead.
Children are exhausting. I think that instead of giving their children "the talk" parents only have to make them take care of small children for any extended period of time. I don't think that I have ever heard my name said so many times in a single day. Anytime that my attention was drawn away from the children, I was immediately barraged with "Brooks Brooks Brooks look Brooks look look Brooks Brooks." That really wasn't that bad though, because I have the innate ability to completely tune out any noise, much to the dismay of those who are trying to have a conversation with me.
Now for a complete change of pace I am going to post an image and write a little about it.
Ok I think thats enough torture for you all today...
See Ya Buds
Brooks
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Stream of Consciousness
Butter: It makes me fat and unhappy. I am usually unhappy when I feel fat, but I usually have been eating some good food so its not all bad. Do you know what is all bad though... the inability to stop sweating in a normal period of time. I can take a cold shower after working out and when I finish I am still sweating as much as when I was exercising. Exercising makes me not fat, which makes me happy. This stream of consciousness on the other hand does not make me feel happy. It also seems to deal much to heavily with my feelings. So to avoid my feelings I am going to talk about Tom Cruise and how I can no longer take him seriously. I mean honestly, have you read what scientologists believe? They think the aliens lived inside volcanos and have now been absorbed into our bodies through shampoo. My favorite shampoo fragrance is coconut. When I use it, I am transported to a island and I am washing myself beneath a freshwater waterfall. I think that the last sentence that I just typed makes me a fag. I'm ok with that though. Marko used to call cigarettes fags. He was cool for an Australian-Serb. Serb reminds me of the word serve, which reminds me of Chilis, which makes me want to kill myself, which makes me want to stop typing. So it will
OK WE WILL SEE YA BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUD
brooksie baby
Friday, November 13, 2009
On Forgiveness
—`Abdu'l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace
I must begin by asking forgiveness. I am an imperfect man, and as such, I have failed. Midnight has come and gone with no new post on my blog. I went a full 24 hour period without posting which means that I will not be able to post for 100 consecutive days. On day seven, I have already disqualified myself from reaching my goals. I could respond to this by making excuses about my day at work. I could say that because I worked from 10:15 this morning to 11:56 tonight, I was not able to complete my post, but I would rather ask forgiveness. I ask it from you, my readers, and from myself. I will forgive myself, but first I must have your forgiveness. Will you forgive me for my failure to do that which I have promised?
According to Wikipedia, forgiveness is defined as as "the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and/or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution. The Oxford English Dictionary defines forgiveness as 'to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offence or debt'." Using that definition, if I am to fully forgive myself, I must give up my self-resentment for not posting within the time boundaries that I placed at the beginning of this endeavor. My forgiveness of myself is crucial to the continuance of this blogging exercise, because if I do not release my resentment then I will begin to see this endeavor and its continuance as a failure. If I begin to view this blog as a failure, then there is no reason for me to continue to invest and sacrifice the time that it takes to create these entries. Basically if I don't learn to forgive myself then I carry a defeatist attitude that ultimately leads to defeat.
The funny thing about forgiveness is that, even if you forgive me for any wrong that I have committed against you, it does no good if I cannot except your forgiveness and use your forgiveness to forgive myself. If I ask for forgiveness and you do not grant it, then the transgression that I committed to you still has an influence on both of us. The unresolved problem can cause bitterness and anger and stress because it is not being dealt with. If you forgive me, but I do not except it then the problem will continue to have an influence on me. It can lead to me carrying attitudes of failure and defeat, which can wreak havoc on my current and future relationships. However, If you forgive me and I choose to accept your forgiveness and forgive myself, I can move past the problem and learn from it and be a stronger and better and ultimately freer person because of it.
Learn to forgive others and forgive yourself. I have a friend who, at one time, committed a rather grievous sin against me. There was a period, during which, I thought I would be unable to forgive him, but thankfully God was able to do a big work in my heart and I was able to forgive him. Through that forgiveness he and I have grown much closer and have a deeper relationship. The fact that God allowed my heart to be softened to forgiveness also provided a frame of reference for a forgiveness trial that he has had to face in his own life. The fact that I, through the grace of God, was able to forgive him, provided an example and precedent when he was face with a situation where he had to forgive. Forgiveness changes people. Both the forgiver and the forgiven are changed by the act of forgiveness and reconciliation. None of us deserve forgiveness, that is why it is always a gift. Learn to except and value that gift and you will have a better, richer, and more fulfilling life
It is very easy to forgive others their mistakes; it takes more grit and gumption to forgive them for having witnessed your own.- JESSAMYN WEST
I love you all,
Brooksie
P.S. Even though I was late submitting this blog, I will continue to post as if I had finished this before 12 o'clock, which means you should look for a blog tomorrow evening. I woke up this morning and felt as if I had been beaten all night by 13 midgets with baseball bats. Apparently waterball takes its toll on the body. I'll be off now. I have a new liquor to try. It is called "The Kraken" and it is a dark spiced rum..... I know, it sounds delicious right?
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Day 6
The forgiveness blog is coming I promise. I'm just overwhelmed with responsibilities.
I attended a lecture today. It was a guest speaker from SFAU who spoke on Folklore. It was really interesting learning about some of Texas' oldest lore stories. I would like to spend some time looking into it some more.
Much love,
Brooksie Baby
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
This Post is Worthless
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
My Nordic Fury
I have often mused to myself that I was born in the wrong era. I like to think that I would have been much more at home roaming the land wielding my massive sword and hammer fighting alongside my Nordic brothers as we conquered all in the name of great Odin. I'm pretty sure that my name would have been Brookson the Destroyer of Worlds. I would be known throughout the land as the tallest, biggest, fiercest warrior to have ever worn a horned cap, but instead I was born in modern America and all I have ever learned to wield is a Xbox controller and a keyboard. The true glory of battle has eluded me my whole life. I soon turned to sports in hopes of finding a cure for my inherited bloodlust, longing to find something that would slake my thirst for combat, my desire to see the wide-eyed horror of mine enemies before I smote them with all my Nordic might, and to allow me to gorge myself on the feast of victory. One by one each sport failed to provide the thrill and challenge I craved. Football (too controlled), Basketball (too soft) and Baseball (seriously, this one should be obvious) all left me craving more. Until the glorious day that I discovered the one sport that gave me glorious battle that I desired:
For those of you who are unfamiliar with this glorious sport, allow me to provide you with some reference material
This is truly the greatest sport ever created on God's green earth. It is the closest to true battle of any game I have ever seen before it. You push, pull, dunk, grapple, smash, or, in my case, beast your way to victory. The strongest, fastest, and most vicious warriors are rewarded for their efforts. There is no greater joy than fighting your way towards the goal with three grown men trying with all their might to halt your steady march to victory, nor is there any glory greater than being the immovable force which brings thine enemies' progress to a screeching halt.
In waterball, I can live out my destiny. My blood boils at the sound of the first whistle of the game and I am transformed into a different kind of beast. I am Brookson, Destroyer of Worlds.
Come check out our next game on Thursday at 10 its going to be an epic clash
Brooksie Baby
PS. Wow guys you are making me feel really special I now have 10 followers. I might even have what some would call a small audience of readers. I promise to keep diligently working on my craft if you promise to keep reading and leaving your comments and criticisms. Thank you to Jorday Jorday, Lukey Dukey, and Jonesy for your comments on the last entry. So please subscribe and read and if you like it..... tell a friend.
Apparently this journey has inspired my roommate to embark on a mission of his own. Check it out at http://bkingya.blogspot.com/
Monday, November 9, 2009
Day Three of the Life of Me
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Its Day 2 and I am already up against my deadline
Saturday, November 7, 2009
100 Days of Posting
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Tucker Max: Genius Author
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Work In Progress
This is a really rough work that started because of a school assignment and we will see where it goes
That Is Definitely a Versatile Word
It has traditionally been one of the most taboo words in the American English language. There are countless variations and uses for the word, although until recently those uses have remained largely untapped. Once considered to be one of the most shocking swear words, the “F” word has recently begun to carve its own unique niche in American English. There is a famous scene in the 1999 Troy Duffy movie “The Boondock Saints” where the bumbling character Rocco gets rattled by his friends who have played a practical joke on him and he launches into this tirade:
“What did you do?! Fuckin'... what
the fuckin' fuck! Who the fuck, fucked
this fuckin'? fuck. How did you two
fuckin', fucks?......... FUCK!!!”
To which his friend replied, “That certainly illustrates the diversity of the word” (Duffy). This word transformed from a rarely spoken taboo word to one that was used over 260 times in the movie “The Big Lebowski.” This over-use of the word has allowed it to develop beyond being a mere exclamation into a noun, verb, adjective, and adverb. These different lexical items of the word “fuck” will be explored within this paper. Once each lexical use of the word is explained, it should, “certainly [illustrate] the diversity of the word.”
To get a firm grasp on the usage of the word as well as the connotations and ideas surrounding it. I pulled together ten friends from different realms of university life to form a panel to discuss the F-word. They asked that their names be withheld from the paper, but would allow their gender and words to be cited.
The first use of the word “fuck” refers to the actual act of copulation such as “I caught them fucking.” When asked what the word meant in the context of the phrase “I would like to fuck her” all of those interviewed agreed that the sentence expressed the desire of the speaker to have sex with the ambiguous her. One student offered the alternate, but unlikely, interpretation that the speaker’s desire was to bring strife into “her” life.
Although they all agreed that it was referring to the act of having sex, the deeper implications of that act were very diverse. One student (male) said that the connotations of the word in the context of that sentence implied an unabashed act that neither party felt ashamed of. He said that if the speaker had said “I would like to have sex with her” it would leave open the possibility of shame, but to fuck was to do so without shame. To call the act of sex “fucking” was to state it as bluntly and directly as possible. Once this idea was introduced to the panel of interviewees the idea was accepted as being true.
One of the females on the panel said that word communicated the idea of an absence of emotion in the act of sex. She contrasted the phrase “to make love” with the word and stated that two people cannot make love and fuck at the same time. Another female built of that idea by saying that it seemed like fucking would refer to a rougher form of sex and even a possibly degrading act.
Out of the ten members of the panel six said that they were uncomfortable using this word in that context, while the remaining members said they had little to no problem using it, if it applied. The consensus was that it was a direct and unabashed way to refer to possibly rough sex that was focused on external feelings and not internal connection.
The F-word has also become an adverb and adjective and more specifically an intensifier. If one was very tired then saying that they are fucking tired would effectively convey that message. The general consensus from the panel was that the, although diminished, forbidden nature of the word it brings a power that would be lost using another adjective. The word could be used in both negative and positive ways such as “This fucking sucks” or “that was fucking fun” and fits them both equally well. One of the male members on the panel introduced the idea that the word did gain extra meaning when used to express angry or bitterness “Such as I hate you so fucking much right now.” The panel was undecided as to whether the added force was due to the fact that the sentence itself was strongly worded or because of an association with the work “fuck” and its derivatives and anger. This connection was made earlier when discussing rough sex and was seen again in this lexical form.
This was the most common usage of the word excepting the reference to the actual act. It is a strong exclamation that can be used when one is surprised, angry, hurt, or disgusted. It is most appropriate and seems the most natural when referring to the speaker specifically. Most people would not use this word in the case of “ ______ that person is ugly” because it does not refer to the speaker specifically.
Overall the F-word is indeed an extremely versatile and strong word that communicates extreme disgust and displeasure, but has begun to grow and branch into a word that can have positive connotations. It is still a very taboo word, but its use has begun to become more acceptable and mainstream due to its overuse in theatrical media. A word that can be used in most any situation it is definitely a versatile word.Thursday, July 16, 2009
Harry Potter Review
There is always something magical about midnight premiers of blockbuster movies, and (forgive me for this) the magic was definitely in the air during the Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince premier last night. I am not sure if the magic should have been credited to the underdeveloped 17 year old in front of me who kept dabbing drying blood off his forehead. The blood originated from what appeared to be a pocketknife induced Potter-esqe lightening cut that seemed to have been carved moments before he filed into line. Another contributing factor to the electric and frenzied atmosphere that was present last night might have been the young lady who chose to arrive in a slutty Hogwarts uniform that gave her the likeness of a Hermione Granger whose crack cocaine addiction had forced her to start turning tricks in one of the darker corners of Diagon Alley or the sixty-one year old couple that were dressed in eerily accurate Dumbledore and McGonagall costumes. Whatever the cause, there was definitely an aura of excitement and anxiety in the pre-seating line.
I definitely fell subject to the anxiety of the night. With all of the subpar sequels and failed blockbusters that have popped up recently I was more that just a little scared that Harry Potter was going to go the way of the Transformers franchise. The opening scenes did little to settle me fears. I watched as the Death Eaters destroyed the Millennium Bridge and I had flashbacks of Michael Bay’s explosion-fest that was Transformers 2, but my fears were quickly assuaged as the movie settled in to the pace and tone that we have come to expect and love in the Potter series.
The visuals present in this installment were on par with the bar that was set by the Order of the Phoenix. I was somewhat disappointed that the director and screenplay writers decided to avoid a few scenes that would have led to some brilliant battle sequences. The fights that were included in the movie were done quite masterfully.
Overall I thought that the storyline got a bit distracted by the romantic comedy element of the movie. With all of the evil that was present at that time in Potter world, it seems that there should have been much less emphasis placed on the romantic elements of the movie, but it is what it is. Overall it was a great movie and a great lead in to what promises to be the best installment of the series in The Deathly Hallows.